10 Super Ridiculous Things I Actually Believed As A Kid

Isn't it funny how all of us were once kids who didn't know shit about anything and in our desperate attempt to make sense of the things around us, we come up with the darndest theories?

I don't know why but I suddenly remembered the other night all the stupid thoughts I had when I was a kid and I couldn't help but LOL, cringe, and *facepalm* at how I was able to come up with such ridiculous ideas back then.

So I thought I'd share them here because really, my entire childhood suddenly feels like a joke to me now and I hope it makes you laugh too!

WHEN I WAS A KID...

1. I thought that if I doodled on my skin with a sign pen and didn't erase it for days, then it'll stay there forever like a tattoo.

2. I thought that people who have telephones, bicycles, roller blades, and twist door knobs at home are super rich people.

3. I thought I can kill myself by wrapping my face with a plastic bag or covering my face with a pillow while holding my breath for more than one minute.

4. I thought I could run away from home simply by riding a wooden cart (kariton) that I plan to secretly attach at the back of a Manila-bound bus.

5. I thought I was ugly because my legs and arms were full of scars and my knees were darker than the rest of my legs.

Timehop just reminded me today that I was a fugly duckling.

A photo posted by Dominique B. (@niknokniknok) on Jul 18, 2015 at 4:45am PDT

6. I thought I can lighten my skin with laundry bleach so I rubbed Zonrox on my knees as per my equally ridiculous cousin Ida's advice.

7. I thought sitcoms were called "sitcoms" because you watch them while you're sitting.

8. I thought the people we watch on television are actual little people inside the TV so I would always peep at the back of the television set to find them.

9. I thought that apples can be easily grown in backyards so I saved the seeds when I eat apples and bury them at the back of our house wishing it would grow into a tree so I can eat as many apples as I want.

10. I thought people can celebrate birthdays more than once every year so after my birthday, I always wonder when my next birthday is.

If I could travel back in time, I'd like to meet my younger self and laugh at her and her silly ideas but tell her she's awesome and funny anyway - and that having scars and dark knees doesn't make anyone ugly.

I am pretty sure I'm not the only one who had silly thoughts like this as a kid and I bet someone out there had it even worse!

So when you're stressed out and tired and swamped with work and other life things to do, think of something funny about yourself like the stupid things you did and thought about as a kid. It helps, I swear! Look, it even inspired me to write!

Hope you guys laughed at my joke AKA me! Share me your super ridiculous beliefs as a kid too so we can all laugh at them together!